Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Lemme Check...Yep, Still Evil!

Salutations, Sentinels of Solidarity.

Y'know, I really didn't intend to write something political this week, but, frankly, the duplicitous exploits of our beloved Prime Minister really demands a follow-up blast of vitriol.

Just prior to the last federal election, I tried to warn my fellow citizens about the dangers of a Harper majority.  Some might characterize my efforts as failed but I would respectfully disagree.  In fact, a whopping sixty-one percent of Canadians agreed with me and opted for a choice other then Harper.

Unfortunately this also split the vote to the point where our broken political system let l'il Stevie completely off of his leash.  Over the course of the last eleven months, he's gleefully bombed the beautiful and unique face of our country with a red, white and blue neo-con spray-can.

I wish I could say that we asked for this, but honestly...we didn't ask for this.  

Before I proceed to catalog some of Harper's more charming recent initiatives, I want to state two things for the record:

(1) I've voted Conservative in the past, but it was Progressive Conservative. I would never in million years vote for Harper's band of political thugs since they aren't, nor have they ever been, Progressive Conservative.  I hate to break it to you, folks, but the yahoos currently in charge of our government are just a bunch of re-constituted Alliance/Reform wing-nuts with their serial numbers scratched off.    

(2) I'm doing this, not because I'm some sort of crusading liberal on an agenda, but because I'm worried about what our country is morphing into.  The bad thing about living for over forty years is that time and perspective gives you a bird's eye view on incremental change.  It's alleged that Harper once told a conservative Washington think tank that "You won't recognize Canada when I get through with it."  I was more then willing to write this off as a miss-quote but as the months tick by, I'm beginning to think that this was actually a legitimate boast.    

Frankly, that scares the living bejesus out of me since Canada is already starting to look like a Pod Person from Invasion of the Election Snatchers.  What's even scarier is that we're not even half-way through this horror movie yet.

Here are just a few terrifying things that Harper has overseen or proposed during the first year of his political honeymoon:

(1)  I'm In Yer Internetz, Creepin' Yer Webmalez 

The incredibly invasive "Lawful Access" internet spy bill was hastily re-christened the "Protecting Children Against Internet Predators Act", presumably to fool over-worked and distracted soccer moms into thinking that the bill has nothing to do with a Conservative fetish for peeking up our virtual skirts.

And, yes, I think it's despicable that a Liberal party researcher hacked into the personal records of Vic Toews and Tweeted a slew of his personal details all over the internet.  But a large part of me is also thinking: Hey, Vic, how 'bout a little sauce for your goose?

Oh, and for everyone out there who doesn't think that the government would have any vested interest in your innocuous email and browsing history consider that Harper was the dude who banned a young woman from one of his political rallies just because of a photo with her and then-Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff on Facebook.

As I've said time and time before, kids, if the Kool-Aid tastes funny, don't friggin' drink it.

(2) On Today's Complimentary Brunch Menu: Egg On Our Face   Remember back in the day when the word "Conservative" actually applied to fiscal responsibility?  No?  Yeah, neither do I.

In October of 2011 Harper dropped $112,000.00 worth of taxpayer money on a three-day Organization for Economic Co-operation and Development seminar.  This also included a $22,000.00 "Hospitality Tab" for six of the delegates, which I can only imagine translated into pillow mints and free cable pron.

One of the topics for discussion: how to optimize major cuts to government spending.  Which, to me, is kinda like digging a trench for cover from machine gun fire and then diverting a piranha-filled Amazon tributary through it.

P.S. This ridiculous price tag doesn't include the exorbitant fee that the government also paid for consulting firm Deloitte Inc to come up with a Powerpoint presentation explaining step-by-step on how to implement these cuts.

And then there's this glossed-over l'il number concerning $50 million dollars in questionable G8 spending which broke just prior to the election...

Honestly, it's as if Harper's throwing constant scandals at us in the hope that we become desensitized and just don't give a shit anymore.  

(3) Sighence Iz Fer Nurds  A scientist discovers a virus that's annihilating British Columbia's precious sockeye salmon stocks.  Another atmospheric expert discovers a massive gap in the ozone layer right above the Arctic.  Both of them are told to keep their big-word sayin' mouths shut by Harper's Conservatives who apparently don't want you to hear about any bad news that happens during their BLISS THROUGH IGNORANCE watch.

Not to mention that Harper appointed Gary Goodyear, a guy that doesn't even believe in evolution, as Canada's Minister of Science.

As Mark Critch (as Rex Murphy) stated succinctly on This Hour Has 22 Minutes, "Having a creationist science minister is like having Gandhi as our Minister of Defense." 

Sweet Jezum Crow.

He also remains frustratingly myopic when it comes to the subject of medical marijuana usage.

(4) Why Feed A Pit Bull that Wants Us Dead?  News broke last Fall that Conservative MP's had begun to circulate a petition asking that the funding be cut for the Canadian Broadcasting Corporation.  I certainly understand why Harper would consider the CBC to be a thorn in his side since it's one of the last reasonably impartial major news outlets to broadcast stories like this:


Frankly, if the CBC ever gets privatized, we'd better get used to seeing shameful Pearl Harbor-style ambush interviews on Canadian television, like this particularly nauseating example courtesy of "Fox News North"-wannabe Sun T.V.:

(5) "Circumvent The Public Trust, Deceive The Innocent, Defy The Electorate Law"(Best Read in Creepy Robocop Voice)

Elections Canada is currently investigating a slew of complaints about fraudulent calls made to voters in Guelph Ontario during the 2011 campaign.  When the story broke, similar complaints began to surface all across the country.  It wasn't long before the Conservative Party lost it's first sacrificial lamb when junior staffer Mike Sona resigned under a cloud of secrecy.

The most amount of voter complaints in any one previous election has been around fourteen hundred.  This past election has accumulated thirty-one thousand at last count.  We don't know the exact details of the entire story but what we do know is that the Tories procured the location of every voting station in Canada just prior to the election.  They also contacted voters and told them how to get there, despite a warning from Elections Canada that they were wading into murky ethical waters.       

To make matters worse, there's clear evidence that the Conservative Party made significant payments to RackNine Inc. (the company that performed the so-called robo-calls), but didn't declare these expenses to Elections Canada, as required by law.  In a move equivalent to a ninja throwing a smoke grenade, the Tories then attempted to throw the allegations back at the Liberals, but their accusation quickly proved baseless.

Now, as North Americans we get to be all high and mighty about the sanctity of our democracy based on how scrupulous our election process is.  Ergo, if there's even one conclusive example of Harper and company trying to win this last election via subterfuge, we really have to insist that he step aside and face the music.

In doing this blog I've come across at least four other things that royally ticked me off, but, honestly, why go on?  Every day on Facebook I see people get pissed off about how Jason left Melissa for Molly on The Bachelor or that Shannon used Hardy's toothbrush to clean a toilet on Big Brother.

Why can't we summon just a modicum of this rage and indignation when it comes to something that actually has an impact on our own reality?  Something that's clearly an assault on our lives and freedoms and the future we leave for our kids?

Seriously, it's time that we put away partisan politics.  No more Liberals.  No more Conservatives.  It's time that we join a new political trend: Commonsenseism .

It's time to get mad, folks.  It's time to put an end to complacency. 

EPIC:   For those among you who have no memory of Harper's origins, here's a fantastic site with all of his  greatest misses

EPIC RANT:  Sean Devlin, founder of, drops some science at a Vancouver rally against voter suppression.  He nicely embodies the righteous indignation that we should all be feeling right about now...

FAIL:  IMHO, Harper's worst offense is still the jackboot trampling of civil rights of peaceful protestors during the G-20 Summit in 2010.  Honestly, does anyone out there recognize their own country in this clip?  I sure as hell don't.

No comments: